Week 6- Science of Happiness Notes

 Section 1: Mental Habits of Happiness 

Video: Training the Mind for Happiness 

  • Looking at patterns of thought and monitoring them. 
  • Resilient mind in responding to trauma and disease. 
  • We should be alert to potentially toxic thoughts: 

  • Perfectionism 

  • “I should always be perfect.”, praising internal attributes rather than effort is associated with anxiety, an epidemic of perfectionism in young women. 

  • Social Comparison 

  • Upward comparisons reduce self-perceptions. 

  • Downward Comparisons reduce the perceived values of others. 

  • Materialism 

  • Buying and thinking about experiences boots happiness. 

  • Buying and thinking about goods boots happiness less than experiences. 

  • Beneficial to orient the mind towards experiences. 

  • Maximizing 

  • Trying to maximize pleasure in experiences associated with less happiness. 

  • Maximizer: always seeking more pleasure even when pleased already. 

  • Maximizers are more regretful after purchases, less satisfied with life, more depressed, less optimistic, less satisfied with success. 


  • Defining optimism: The expectation that the future will be socially desirable, good, and pleasurable. 


  • Benefits to optimism: 

  1. Overall higher levels of subjective well-being and happiness. 
  2. Higher levels of positive emotion. 
  3. Higher levels of Vagus nerve activation. 
  4. Greater feelings of health. 

 

Essay: “Are you a Maximizer?” 

    • Having many choices is often a curse on our happiness. 
    • “Maximizing is a form of perfectionism; we maximize by searching out all the best possible options when making a decision, hoping to make the “perfect” choice. We satisfice when we choose something based on preset criteria and move on. Satisficing doesn’t mean settling for something less than we really want; it is just a different way to go about making a decision.” 
    • Happy people tend to satisfice more than unhappy people. 
    • Maximizing is associated with discontentment. 
    • We have a limit to decision-making each day and it tires us out. 


  • How to satisfice instead of maximize: 

  • Outline your criteria for success. 

  • Choose the first option that meets your criteria. 

  • Once the decision is made, focus on the positive aspects of your choice. 

  • Embrace the choices you make. 

 

Video: Misconceptions about “Training the Mind” 

  • This is impossible, I am who I am, Immutable products of genes and circumstances. 

  • Neuroplasticity rejects this, we are malleable. 


  • Mindfulness is brainwashing. 

  • Brainwashing is an attempt to change the thoughts and beliefs of a person against their will. This is all up to you. 


  • It encourages over-optimism. 

  • Mindfulness is meant to reveal what is and make you more attuned to reality, not blind to it.  

 

Section 2: Self-Compassion, A Path to Resilience and Happiness 

Video: Why we Need Self-Compassion 

  • Self-compassion: construct developed by Kristin Neff at the University of Texas 


  • Background to self-compassion, Influential attitudes to the self: 

  • Sacrifice and self-flagellation as the main ways to achieve happiness only found in the afterlife. 
  • Martyrdom: considered holy examples as leaders. 
  • Mistakes require punishment. 
  • A narrow view of natural selection, the less than fittest will fail. 
  • Humans have a need to rein in selfishness and destructive impulses.  
  • Behaviorism: Punish undesirable behaviors. 
  • Self-esteem: we must be better than average. 
  • Fierce competition is the route to success. 

  • “Self-compassion is the practice of quieting the inner critic, replacing it with a voice of support, understanding, and caring for oneself”. -Kristin Neff 


  • Three components of self-compassion: 

  1. Self-kindness (vs. Self-judgment) 
  2. Common Humanity (vs. Isolation) 
  3. Mindfulness (vs. over-identification) 

 

Video: The Three Components of Self-Compassion 

  • Viewing compassion for the self and for others the same 


  • Self-Kindness vs. Self Judgement 

    • Treating self with care. 
    • Understanding rather than judging. 
    • Desire to alleviate one's own judging. 
    • Kindness is active, “what can I do to soothe myself.” 


  • Common Humanity vs. Isolation 

    • Framing one's own experience considering the common human experience.  
    • “Life goes wrong.” 
    • Evolutionarily it is bad to be isolated from a group, stop isolating yourself when something does not go to plan. 


  • Mindfulness vs. Over-Identification 

    • Avoiding extremes of suppressing or running away with painful feelings. 
    • Allows us to “be” with painful feelings as they are.  
    • Often, we are lost in the role of “self-critic” to notice the pain we are causing. 
    • We turn too quickly into the “problem solver” instead of noticing the harm we have caused ourselves through blame and judgment.  

 

Video: Overcoming Objections to Self-Compassion 

  • Confusion with self-pity 

    • Self-compassion is different from self-pity because it has the human connection element.  
    • Self-compassion is not egocentric. 


  • Confusion between harsh judgment and discriminating wisdom. 

    • Differences in language. 
    • Constructive criticism vs. Harsh, belittling criticism. 


  • Confusions with self-indulgence 

    • Self-compassion does not mean doing whatever you want. 
    • Compassion wants health and well-being for us. 
    • Compassion doesn’t want suffering. 


  • Confusion with making excuses. 

    • “Research shows you're more likely to take responsibility for mistakes because, again, it's not so psychologically damning to do so” 


  • Motivation with self-criticism 

    • Fear of being bad or worthless 
    • Fear-based motivation: “I am not okay if I fail” 


  • Motivation with self-criticism 

    • Wanting health and wellbeing for yourself 
    • Encouraging yourself in a healthy way without fear 


  • Problems with forceful and harsh punishment or forms of motivation 

  1. The inevitability of depression after harsh criticism. 
  2. Loss of fate in oneself and loss of confidence. 
  3. Increased fear of failure. 

  • Self-compassion focuses on self-acceptance instead of self-improvement. 


  • “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself, then I can change” -Carl Rogers 


  • Self-compassion provides the safety to see ourselves clearly and work on ourselves meaningfully without fear of failure. 

 

Essay: Why Self Compassion Trumps Self Esteem 

  • To boost our own egos, we tend to put others down to feel better in comparison. 
  • Believing our faults are someone else’s we can temporarily alleviate insecurity, but it only grows as we do this. 
  • “The goalposts for what count as “good enough” seem always to remain out of reach. No matter how well we do, someone else always seems to be doing it better. The result of this line of thinking is sobering: Millions of people need to take pharmaceuticals every day just to cope with daily life. Insecurity, anxiety, and depression are incredibly common in our society, and much of this is due to self-judgment, to beating ourselves up when we feel we aren’t winning in the game of life.” 
  • The answer: stop labeling as “good” or “bad.” 
  • Self-compassion allows us room for self-improvement without damaging self-criticism. 

 

Video: The Benefits Linked to Self-Compassion 

  • Research shows that trait-level self-compassionate people enjoy better psychological health.  


  • Correlation studies show that self-compassion is associated with: 

    • Lower levels of anxiety and depression 
    • Lower levels of cortisol (stress hormone) and increased heart rate variability (strength of vagus nerve) for self-soothing. 
    • Less perfectionism and fear of failure. 
    • Better coping with stressors (failure, chronic pain) 
    • Greater willingness to validate negative emotions. 


  • Positive psychological strengths associated with self-compassion: 

    • Wisdom 
    • Happiness 
    • Optimism 
    • Curiosity 
    • Personal initiative 
    • Emotional intelligence 


  • Self-compassion is an important mediator between mindfulness and happiness. 


  • Self-compassion tends to promote positive health-related behaviors such as sticking to a diet, exercising, 

  • seeking medical help when needed.  

 

Section 3: Finding “Flow” and Setting Goals 

Video: Introduction to Flow 

  • Question of “what are people feeling in their most powerful moments of innovation?” 

  • Defining Flow: An intrinsically rewarding or optimal state that results from an intense engagement with daily activities. 

  • Feeling flow: 

    • Arises from the right balance of challenge and skill level. 
    • Flow is exhilarating and satisfying and cultivating happiness. 


  • When you're in a state of flow... 

    • You're focused on the task at hand. 
    • Forget about yourself, others, and the world around you. 
    • You lose track of time. 
    • You become more creative and productive.  


  • Choosing to engage inflow is a predictor of happiness over time. 

 

Video: How Goals Foster Happiness 

    • Humans are goal-driven organisms. 
    • The dopamine system leads to getting someone to approach their goals. 


  • Types of goals associated with greater happiness: 

  • - Goals that consider other’s happiness or the greater good 
  • - Goals that increase feelings of autonomy, competence, and relatedness. 
  • - Intrinsic goals 

  • References:
  • Dacher Keltner, Ph.D., Founding Faculty Director, Greater Good Science Center, Professor of Psychology and Director of the Berkeley Social Interaction Laboratory, UC Berkeley
    •       Emiliana Simon-Thomas, Ph.D., Science Director, Greater Good Science Center, UC Berkeley

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